The Fifth Element, Newport RI

509 Thames St.
Newport, RI

I was waiting on a friend with my boyfriend, and out of all the places we could see, this one screamed out at us as being the most crowded, and the most bumpin. There was no cover charge, but we WERE carded. Half of it is a club, half of it is a bar. (I assume it's different on non-Friday nights). We went there at around 10:30, in the middle of June, on a Friday night, and the place was packed. We got a seat at the bar somehow, and the place, though packed, was manuverable, and smelled INCREDIBLY clean. The decor was actually really suave. Waterfall walls, and a HUGE selection of liquor. Naturally, ESPN was on the two flatscreens, and BlackeyedBritanyRhiannaPerryGaga's songs were blaring from the colourfully lit dance floor, which was nicely seperated from the bar so you could make a decision whether or not to dance (not not whether or not to hear the slew of Top 40). I was a fan of Long Islands UNTIL I had one from this place. At first I thought, "Oh how chic, the name, the decor, the glasses, I think this place is a great afterparty" until I realized, we were probably the only people there who couldn't legally rent a car (due to age).
I'm not saying people there were ugly, in fact, they were all dressed relatively well (with the exception of some horribly themed ties), but if you're looking for a place that seems like it's made for a 20's crowd, it looks the part, but most DEFINITELY isn't. It seemed like everyone there was either too single to have children, or their children already left for college. It was one of those places where you could meet your second date from Match.com and feel confident about yourself. I felt extremely out of place. There were no hot bartenders, either. They were all at LEAST in their 30s and they were all men.
If you're in your late 20s or older, and feel a little more mature than getting shitfaced at some crazy as hell pub somewhere, then I couldn't recommend a BETTER place than The Fifth Element. If you're into dancing on a floor, but not watching people have virtual sex, (or feel like you have to be Julia Styles) then this is also the place for you.
Also, remember, I was bias because I went on a Friday night. I even said to my boyfriend that I bet this place is really great on a normal evening around dinner time. I wouldn't be opposed to going, just because of the atmosphere (you know, after work, to talk about world events and doctor appointments).
The price range was moderate, the atmosphere was pretty sweet, but if you're under 25 and or, aren't employed/apart of a committe/don't shop at Wholefoods, I would recommend NOT going there. I'm not saying older people shouldn't have their fountains of youth in which to bathe freely to Poker Face and I've Got a Feeling (except? what?)...and wear clothes that LOOK like they could be from Forvever 21 (but are really Lands End or Talbots), I'm just saying, if you're in your early 20s, looks of this place are frigging deceiving.
Ah well, at least we gave the bouncer who was carding people something to do.

Grade B.
Because I'm sure I'd love to go there 15 years from now.